My Lesson in Gratitude

Last week I was fortunate to have taken a vacation in the Berkshires.  Part of my rest and relaxation included a stay at The Kripalu Institute, a center for Yoga, Health and Wellness.  One of my interests is in self development and empowerment; I attended a series of lectures by psychologist Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar.  His specialty is in Positive Psychology, which is the psychology of positive living:  To nurture genius, make normal life emotionally fulfilling.  Dr. Ben- Shahar spoke about many topics, including stress management, mind-body connections, yoga, exercise, meditation and happiness.  I'd like to share some of his material with you. I hope you find it as moving and motivational as I did.

 One of the foundations of most religions is the concept of gratitude.  This is no coincidence, as Dr. Tal said, "When we appreciate the good in our lives, the good appreciates".  One of the lessons that researchers have learned from interviewing people who are dying was that when their time remaining was short, they appreciated themselves and their loved ones more.  They didn't take anything for granted.   Why must something tragic happen before we learn to appreciate the ordinary? 

 In 1933 Helen Keller wrote an essay for The Atlantic titled; "Three Days to See" ( http://www.theatlantic.com/past/docs/issues/33jan/keller.htm )   it is definitely worth your reading.  In her essay, Helen speaks of how the sighted have little appreciation for the blessing of vision, and how she, if given just 3 days of sight she would fill her time seeing the faces of loved ones, art, nature, theatre, architecture, to name just a few.   Her thirst to see as much as she could, "storing up memories for the long night ahead" spoke of the appreciation for sight that so many of us take for granted.   How would you see the world if you knew that in 3 days you would no longer ever see again?

 Unfortunately, we all become so jaded by the blessings in our lives that we disregard them and chose to focus on negative things.  This negative polarity is a natural inclination, so we need gratitude to keep us balanced. Dr. Tal advised that the expression of gratitude begets more gratitude and happiness in our lives.   He recommended a daily ritual of just thinking of 5 things for which you are grateful, and write them down.   This is a very valuable gift to share with your family as well:   What would it mean to your family to sit down at a meal and ask everyone to share with each other the things for which they are grateful? What good deeds did anyone perform or witness in the past week?  Lead your children by example.  Creating a ritual which is regularly repeatable will insure that it gets done, and make a wonderful and valuable contribution to your lives.  

 Perhaps you are thinking, "What does this have to do with Orthodontics, or teeth?   You're an orthodontist! "   You are correct. It actually has to do with all aspects of our lives both personal and professional.   I am also a person who cares about people, and I am excited to share my appreciation for appreciation with you!  

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