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Mother Uses Facebook to Search for Son Adopted in 1981

A Peekskill native has turned to Facebook to help her find the son she gave up for adoption 30 years ago in hopes she "did the right thing."

In 1981, Tracie Gasbarra was a student who found herself in a predicament with which she had seen her peers struggle. She was pregnant by her high school sweetheart.  

She gave the baby up for adoption 30 years ago and has now turned to her 114 Facebook friends for help finding him. Her mesage is spreading quickly on the social networking site, she said.

“I just want to make sure I did the right thing,” Gasbarra said, of why she has spent years searching for her son.

 “I saw several of my classmates have babies, drop out of school…I knew there was no way I could do it,” Gasbarra said, explaining her mother had died a year earlier and that her father was fully supportive of whatever decision she made. “I was looking at the bigger picture.”

Gasbarra posted the following statement as her status on Facebook last Friday:

It is said that there is only 6 degrees of separation, I believe that through Facebook, the degrees have lessoned. So I'm asking for everyone I've friended to help me with my search. In 1981 I gave up my son Chris for adoption. He was born December 10th at Peekskill Community Hospital. My email is Tgasbarra@gmail.com. Please copy and paste this message and help me find him. I've joined so many adoption sights without any response so maybe this will result in my finding him.

“I didn’t expect it to travel as fast as it did. It is insane” Gasbarra told Patch.

Last Friday, Gasbarra was on the computer and thought about how her older son had advised her not to post her search on Facebook, for fear that she “might get weird people” contacting her.

“I thought you know what, I don’t care, and boom. I love how supportive people have been. I have people from clear across the country contacting me about their similar situations.  And my husband is in the military and he posted it and his friends know people around the world,” she said. “The world is getting smaller,” Gasbarra said, explaining she hopes that works to her advantage.

Gasbarra was born and raised in Peekskill, where her baby was born, as stated in her message. After the adoption, Gasbarra said she thought it might feel like it never happened. But she suffered from the experience.

"The first evening I had returned home from the hospital, I kept hearing a baby crying. I later learned that this was something normal. It tore me up," Gasbarra remembers today.

She is now a 47-year-old insurance agent who recently moved to Walden, N.Y., and has had four children since the one she had adopted – two boys, 27 and 23 and two girls, 10 and 11.

She said she still gets sad every Dec. 10 on Chris' birthday.

"His birthdays always make me miss him, even though I never even held him.  That's the one thing I regret with all my heart. I was afraid I would change my mind and do the wrong thing. Hopefully, with all the support I'm getting from all over the country, I'll be able to wrap my arms around him and give him the biggest hug."

Legally, Gasbarra could not attempt to find the adopted boy until he turned 21 and she cannot get any information from the Town of Cortlandt or others until he turns 50.

“He may not even be looking. He is 30 years old now,” Gasbarra said. “I know he might be fine and happy and not worried about a thing.” She explained that if he is looking she would have more easily been able to find him. If he had searched his name and date of birth that would show up in google, she said.

"Whatever the outcome may be, I think I'm ready to accept it, be it good or bad.  Hopefully it'll turn out good for everyone involved," she said.

The adoption in 1981 was closed and Gasbarra knew very little about the people who raised her son.

“I knew the parents couldn’t have kids, which helps me feel better. I know they adopted a little girl before they adopted him. I know they were both in the medical field; one was physical therapist. That is all I know about them,” Gasbarra said. She also knew the name they chose for him, Christopher John.

Now Gasbarra has a Facebook page made titled “Find Chris” and people continue to spread her message. If you think you have any information on the adoption please contact Gasbarra at tgasbarra@gmail.com.

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Tracie Gasbarra February 17, 2012 at 11:45 PM
Thank you Tom Lotze! I have so many people helping me with this search. The support has been amazing and I can no longer say that there is no such thing as human kindness!
Debra Jones March 10, 2012 at 08:28 PM
I hope that one day you get to see your son. I certainly wish you loads of luck. I'm not sure how I came to this website and read it, but I am a Gasbarra too! God bless that at the time, you felt you did the right thing. Just so you know....you did do the right thing. :o)
ROBIN VERNAE LEMON March 12, 2012 at 03:51 PM
HI GREAT STORY MY NAME IS ROBIN LEMON AND I ALSO WENT TO PEEKSKILL HIGH GRADUATED 1979 SINCE THEN I AM LOOKING FOR MY DAUGHTER ALSO MY FATHER MADE ME GIVE MY DAUGHTER UP WHEN I WAS 20 YRS OLD AND I WAS SAD EVER SINCE HER BIRTHDAY IS JULY 20 1980 SHE IS THIRTY ONE RIGHT NOW I HAD A INCIDENT LAST YEAR AND I HAD PUT IT ON FACEBOOK THEN ONE NIGHT A GUY NAME JOHNATHAN CALLED HE SAID MAY I SPEAK TO ROBIN PLEASE I SAID YES THIS IS HER HE SAID DO YOU HAVE A DAUGHTER NAME YVETTE I SAID I HAVE A DAUGHTER NAME YVONNE LATISHE LEMON HE SAID OK WRONG NUMBER BUT THEY CALLED MY CELL NUMBER BEFORE I SIGN THE PAPERS THEY ASK ME IF THEY WANT ME TO CHANGE HER NAME I SAID NO KEEP THE YVONNE LATISHE I FEEL SAD CAUSE THEY COULD OF CHANGED IT I HOPE NOT EVERY BIRTHDAY I BUY A BALLOON AND SEND IT IN THE AIR I MISS HER I WISH I CAN SEE AND HEAR FROM HER DO YOU KNOW HW ABOUT I CAN LOOK FOR HER THANKS FOR READING GOOD LUCK
Tracie Nube Gasbarra March 12, 2012 at 11:58 PM
Robin, The only advise I can give you is don't ever give up. Keep posting on FB and word will spread. There are so many people who are now sharing this story and it made it around the world in less than 3 days. I wish you all the best and luck in your search and one day, you will find your daughter. Please keep me posted! Tracie
Laura Schwartz July 21, 2012 at 06:08 PM
www.nyadoptees.com can help you. Search angels never charge and there's always lots of support.

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